Getting free is one thing. Staying free is another. When some people are asked, “What is your biggest fear?” Many answer spiders, snakes, or heights. My biggest fear was relapse.
For almost eight, drug-free years, relapse remained a constant concern. As a former addict, I did not want to fall back into the pit that I was rescued from! And you know what, the devil knew that and used my fear to torment me. At times, it was almost unbearable!
Just recently, I had physical issues that caused debilitating pain. It has only been a few days since I could walk without the assistance of a cane. While my body was weak, the devil began to attack my mind once again with the recurring fear of relapse.
But in the midst of the whispers and the lies of destined failure, JESUS reminded me to Whom I belong.
He reminded me that He chose me for a purpose. He reminded me that He has called me out of darkness and into His marvelous light for His glory. And, He reminded me that there is a great calling on my life!
My Precious Savior met me right where I was, in the middle of my pain and my despair, and He began to minister to me. He showed me, in His Word, the things I needed to hear, but not only for me, for others, too—especially those struggling with any type of addiction. Many suffer in silence and need to know they do not suffer alone!
The first thing the Lord spoke to me was, “You have to stay free.”
Galatians 5:1: Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.
- Stand fast: stand firm, unmovable, fixed. When the Lord brings freedom to our lives, we must do whatever it takes to stay free! Refuse to go back to the chains of bondage!
1 Peter 1:7: That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ…
- As the days went on, and grew harder, the Word was my strength! JESUS was my refuge and my hiding place. When the struggle grew overwhelming, I cried and those tears brought relief. I knew He was hearing what I could not put into words.
1 Corinthians 10:12-13: Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall. There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.
- God makes a way of escape: JESUS! He is our escape! He bears our burdens. He bore those stripes so we could proclaim healing. He suffered so that we don’t have to suffer! And, then we are reminded to be very careful–just when we think we have it all together, we find out just how broken we really are! Just when we think we have everything figured out, we realize how clueless we really are!
Never forget how far we have come: eight seconds, eight minutes, eight weeks, eight months, or eight years addiction free. God will guide you if you give him your heart. There will be times of testing, but in your weakest moment, remember that victory belongs to you! There is nothing to fear. You are a survivor—be proud of that fact! And always know, what the enemy sought to use to destroy you, God turned it around for good. You have a right and a reason to Praise Him!
So tonight, I sit here with a smile on my face because I know the gates of hell did not prevail. I have a Defender who helps me in my times of trouble. There is no need to fear. The Lord is with me.
I love my JESUS
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